New Husband hires pretty female roofer, should I be mad? Is he interested in her?
Just Married asked:
My husband and I were married less than a month ago. After we got back from our honeymoon, he started getting estimates from roofing companies. Well, this good looking woman came out and gave an estimate along with her sob story of being a single mom. Her estimate was the lowest (by $50) so he chose her. Now, the job is done… she came to get her check last night. She came in, did not say a word to me (no eye contact), talked to my husband and left. Well my husband came up with some excuse to run out and talk to her. I jumped up and said ‘No, that’s not necessary.’ He seemed shocked that I said something, but said okay. Well then he decided to take the dog outside. I don’t know if went to talk to her or not, but it pisses me off. And now I’m wondering if they talk while he’s at work. He has a job where he could easily cheat and get away with it. Am I being paranoid? Is he showing to much interest in her?
My husband and I were married less than a month ago. After we got back from our honeymoon, he started getting estimates from roofing companies. Well, this good looking woman came out and gave an estimate along with her sob story of being a single mom. Her estimate was the lowest (by $50) so he chose her. Now, the job is done… she came to get her check last night. She came in, did not say a word to me (no eye contact), talked to my husband and left. Well my husband came up with some excuse to run out and talk to her. I jumped up and said ‘No, that’s not necessary.’ He seemed shocked that I said something, but said okay. Well then he decided to take the dog outside. I don’t know if went to talk to her or not, but it pisses me off. And now I’m wondering if they talk while he’s at work. He has a job where he could easily cheat and get away with it. Am I being paranoid? Is he showing to much interest in her?
Tagged with: Good Looking Woman • Honeymoon • Single Mom
Filed under: FAQ
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i would be- confront him see what he tells you
Need marriage counseling, because you are headed for divorce if you can not reconcile your trust issues and he is giving you cause not to trust him.
You are fine. The woman roofer should have said hello to you especially if she came into your house. It was rude of her.
Other than this, has he ever given you any other reason not to trust him? If so then keep your eyes and ears open and even do some investigation of your own. If he hasn’t given you any reason up until now, talk to him about your feelings and see what his response is.
Have you two talked about this? Suspicion seems to only be a problem when you start accusing without good solid evidence. Why don’t you try to go for some of that?
Talk to him.
Don’t be paranoid cause I think he just got a crush on her like a silly little boy. In a few days he will not even remember her name you know. Oh and next time, you hire the contract guy, they have lots of great looking male construction guys.
You should contact that show “Cheaters”
They’ll find out for you.
Rope him in
I am glad that I’m not married.
he’s a whore, you should really tell him it bothers u.
Doesn’t sound good, but until he proves you wrong, there’s really nothing you can do. Women face these situations all of the time. Men have women bosses, co-workers, etc..
I would just make it clear to him that you are not encouraging any friendship with this woman on his part. She was a contractor, it’s over with.
you should talk to him about it if he is stand offish and tries to bring up another topic you should be concerned
First off, I don’t think I would of let my husband hire a woman, to re-do my roof….but now that you have, I would definititely be asking him all of my concerns…and now that it’s done, she should never have to come back…next time don’t let him fall for a pretty face and sob story!!!!
Was it the normal time to take the dog out? Men don’t typically cheat so soon after marriage. You should continue to speak up though or he will walk all over you. Lay down the boundaries now. Good Luck
Your relationship has got some major trust issues. Has he given you a reason not to trust him? If not give him the benefit of the doubt, and just ask him out right.
I think you’re overreacting a bit. If she was the lowest bid and did good work, then who cares if it was a woman or a man doing the job. If she didn’t make eye contact with you, so what, there is no law that says she has to look at every person in the room. Maybe your husband had a legitimate reason to talk with her. Maybe he had a question about the roof. So what if he talks with her. Maybe he felt sorry for her. Big deal! As long as he doesn’t cheat, he should be able to talk with anyone he wants to. You really need to relax or you are going to doom your marriage to failure.
If he is showing interest in a female just be thankful he isn’t ***. Seriously, if he doesn’t have any history of cheating, give him some room. Talk to him. Let him know that you have something special together. Tell him that you are concerned about his conduct around roofer gal. Let him know that it could be construed as suspicious. Just try and be tactful about it. If she is pretty, maybe make a comment about it. Use her to your advantage. He is a newlywed and will most likely not cheat on you this quick if he is a cheater. Good Luck. I hope all works out well.
Well if she gave the lowest estimate then he may have hired her for that reason, not because of her appearance. If she did a good job, then it seems he made the right move.
Since he’s a guy, he will notice attractive women. That doesn’t go away when a guy gets married. I think it was dumb of him to try running outside to talk to her, but it doesn’t mean he was trying to cheat. If your husband has always been faithful then you should trust him. He’ll be around beautiful women his entire life so if he’s going to cheat yelling at him now won’t change that.
I wouldn’t say you are paranoid, but cut him a little slack. I’m sure you’ve smiled at a few good looking guys along the way. It doesn’t mean you’re cheating.
She performed her job, collected her pay and that should be the end of it. He has no business with her anymore. I hope he isn’t maintaining contact with her. There would be no reason to at this point.
If you lived together before you got married is probably feeling tied down now and bonded. Give him a little space and show / tell him that you trust him even though it is driving you up the wall.
That way hell know that marriage is not the end of the world and he will love you for it.
you have some trust issues….. has he ever cheated before? maybe she said nothing to yuo because she was nervous many women accuse women of cheating and wanting thier husbands when they are in a job like that….. I would say that they are just friends and that is all…. i wouls sit him down and speak with him before you head to divorce court hun.
As your name suggest and you told us you are Just Married. As such I somehow doubt that your mate is interested in cheating on you already. Perhaps this good looking roofer is giving some positive stokes to your husbands ego and he is getting carried away with them. Why not sit down with him and let him know how you felt about him hiring her etc., and that you feel that she was hired as a professional to complete a job and that the job is done now so there is no need to continue any type of communication with her. Have confidence in yourself and the fact that he married you less then a month ago and so he must be in love with you. The first year is the toughest in any marriage but you do need to discuss all problems openly and maturely. Best of luck in resolving this issue and I hope that your roofing problems have been corrected also.
Ouch! Not a good way to start off a marraige. You really need to stop being so jealous. If my hubby hired a female roofer it would probably be because he just wanted to see if she could really do the job. Kinda outta humor. I know that because I know him and wouldn’t be hurt. She probably didn’t talk to you or give you eye contact because women know a jealous wife when they see one. You probably had that look on your face that wasn’t very warm and inviting. The bottom line is that you don’t trust your husband and you have to wonder if you even married him for the right reasons.
They say that 90% of spouses know intuitively when they have been cheated on. If you are a newlywed and already struggling with isues of trust, I would say there is a problem.
Once that trust is gone it never can be restored
He might not actuall y have cheated and could just be attracted to her.
It would be pretty stupid to bring her to your home if something had occured.
I f he is cheating, he shouldn’t be hard to catch…
Check his cell phone calls
OMG….. YOU NEED TO SPEEK TO HIM BEFORE IT GOES TO FAR….. THE JOB IS DONE AND NO NEED TO TALK TO HER PERIOD……HAS HE CHEATED BEFORE? DO YOU TRUST HIM? IF NOT THEN YOU NEED TO PUT ASTOP TO IT CAUSE KNOW YOUR MARRIED…ITS NOT LIKE YOU DONT HAVE A WEDDING BAND……IS THIS CONTINUES YOU SHOULD CONFRONT THE HOME WREACKER AND LET HER KNOW WERE YOU STAND…. OR MAYBE JUST ASK HER WHY WOULD SHE HAVE THE NECESITY TO CONTINUE TO TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND AFTER THE JOB IS DONE? EIGHTHER WAY TALK TO ONE OF THEM TODAY DONT LET IT PASS THIS INCCIDENT REMEMBER FOLLOW YOUR GUT….
Look at it as the whole picture. Has he change any since he met this so called roofer girl. Is he different towards you in any way? How about coming on to him and see what his reaction is? If he turns you away then I would say it’s a problem. Communication is key tell him please what is on your mind and then work on it. If someone bothers me I tell my man right way. If it’s an all out brawl I know there is something wrong. Good luck!
I’ll be honest with you I’d be suspious too. I mean you guys are newly married, your going to have to learn to trust him and he’s going to have to learn to trust you. Has he ever given you reason to not trust him? In a way I want to say dont worry but I know I would. I mean I’d be concerned with this. If you can suprise him at work sometime. Check his emails do the investigating that you think you need to do. I know if you talk with him most people deny things, and maybe this is nothing, but its good to know for sure and you’ll trust him that much more if it is nothing!
she went in your house & no eye contact with u?? not even said hi? & your husband took a walk after that? as woman, in my opinion, you should watch out for your husband. u better do it now before it is too late. u r still early in marriage. do not ruin all that. must confront with him also. show him how much u care & jealous about him& that lady!
in conclusion…honestly i feel something is not right there. i am putting myself in your shoes. i know how u feel..
hope for the best
I would be so pissed. I am a guy and in my opinion, I would not like a woman to work on my roof, she’s a girl. I would definately be questioning your husband. If she was as hot as she sounds and I was your husband, I wouldn’t just hire her for a roof job. I’d hire her for another job.
whoa whoa whoa. you are making too much of this! you just got married! he wouldn’t do that! she had that lowest price! he’s doing house jobs, which is a plus! please………calm down, trust him.
Yes you are being paranoid especially if your TRUST him…if you do not trust hime then why did you marry him? If you want answers and truthful ones…confront the situation in a calm once again CALM manner and ask him why he felt the need to walk the dog while she was still out there? Do not accuse him of anything because that will **** him off. Just ask in a joking yet serious manner, or ask “O she was pretty wasn’t she…and see his reaction.
If all you’ve got is what you said, then I would say you’re being uber-paranoid. He may have found her attractive, but so what? I bet you find people attractive all the time. Being attracted to does not mean you’re cheating with. Maybe he honestly feels sorry for her being a single mom and wanted to tell her so, but her bid was the lowest, so it’s also possible that there’s nothing more than a simple roofing job going on. You’ll need to have some kind of facts before you start accusing of cheating, becasue over the course of the rest of your lives, sometimes you will be attrected to other people. People are attractive. If you think that he’s cheating on you every time he finds someone else attractive, if you think that people are incapable of resisting an attractive member of the opposite gender, what does that say about you when you someday find an attractive plumer who needs to fix the toilet while he’s at work?
He seems alittle interested in her. But first things first you can tell if he has been cheating by his actions. Like does he sometimes just sit there in a daze, Or does he not have that much interest in your *** life since she came along? Or is he always making exuses about going to do things and doesn’t offer you to go with him. And you can just come out and say that you seen her with some guy at the store hugging and kissing… Look at his reaction to it if he gets up and changes the subject right away then he might be jelouse, and if asked alot of questions like when, where, what did he look like then My guess is that there is something going on with them two. But if he just brushes it off like it is nothing then may it’s just you seeing something that is really not there. I hope this helps.
communication and being honest about your feelings with your husband is advisable.
How long have you known each other? If you trusted him enough to marry him and spend the rest of your life with him, then grow up and do it. Ask him out right if there is something going on if it is killing you to know. Otherwise trust in the vows that you took. Be open and honest with him. Tell him that it has bothered you. Talk about what you two can do together to keep you from feeling that way. If you don’t communicate, you could end up a statistic. Good Luck!
I really wouldn’t stress yourself out over this. She did her job and that should be the end of it. If for some reason its not then you have to discuss it. Why did he want to talk to her after wards anyway??? As for her not speaking to you maybe she sensed the hostility between you and felt it best to just get paid and leave. If your looking for something you will find it, just relax and enjoy the honeymoon. I’m sure it was very innocent.
However if they continue to speak now It is a problem. Then I would address it with him. If she was a pretty women he most likely was just intrigued by her nothing more. He married you honey,Hes not going to run off with the roofer. Next time you need some work done around the house maybe you should set up the appts.
What has he been like otherwise during your relationship? Has he ever wandered or cheated before while you were dating? Has he been very reliable? I think his actions are a little strange and so are hers. Most professionals greet both husband and wife. When I was in sales and met with the husband and wife for meetings, I always actually paid extra attention to the wife so she’d not be annoyed. I also was smart enough to know that most wives make the final decision about housing issues.
Keep on eye on this and let him know you think it’s unprofessonal behavior on her part. Check your finances too, I hope the payment arrangements are on the up & up.
Your husband is married not dead. Have confidence in you self and what you bring to the relationship. He married you remember. The roofer will be gone in a few days. Now if the roof starts to leak then you got problems.
personally i dont know the answer to your question but maybe you should get over him and move on since you even can consider that he would cheat on you and if you are having similar problems you shouldnt be answering other persons questions unlike your husband i dont get the look from other women if you can take a look at my myspace page search my email then you will understand why i dont get that lucky and why i want to hold on to my woman